Month August 2026

When the Town Council Outsourced Zoning to a Psychic Hotline, Backyards Became Bermuda Triangles

Featured image

Riverwood's elected officials recently handed over all residential zoning appeals to a midday psychic hotline-only to watch flowerbeds vanish, garden gnomes enter witness protection, and neighborly fences slip into alternate dimensions. As bewildered homeowners report missing barbecue grills and spontaneous wormholes, the council scrambles to reinterpret tarot readings as enforceable ordinances.